You may be asking yourself how does this lowly blogger that is not nearly as world famous and popular as Conservative Humor and Satire by Radioactive Liberty actually know that Barack Obama is evil? It’s not a hard thing to spot, really.
We know that you are judged by the company you keep. We know this for the Bible tells us so. (Screw you baby-Jesus-hating atheists, you’re all going to hell anyway) What company does Barack Obama keep? Let’s dig, shall we?
First, there is William Ayers. William Ayers is an unrepentant terrorist that has bombed government targets in his homeland. Whoa, talk about shitting where you eat, right? Speaking of shitting where you eat, do you know who else shits where they eat? Hippies that’s who. Who else hates America? Hippies, that’s who. That’s right, William Ayers is dirty, stinkin’, hippie. He’s got the long hair, the hatred for America, and the stupid ideas about how life is supposed to be fair. Granted, he’s lost the whole peace thing with the bombings, but he’s still a God damned hippie.
Next up, Da Revurund, Jeremiah Wright. Jeremiah Wright is the head of some whacko, America hating, religious cult. Do you know who else starts whacko, America hating, religious cults? Hippies, that’s who. It won’t be long before the whole congregation is room temperature from the Jonestown Jungle Juice. Granted, he kinda loses the hippie cred with all that negative, mellow-harshing, energy he’s putting out, but that doesn’t change the fact that he’s a worthless, oxygen-thieving hippie.
Finally, there’s Tony Rezko. He’s done a lot of stuff to help Democrats get elected, and was arrested because of it. Do you know who else gets arrested while trying to get Democrats elected? Hippies, that’s who. Like a long-haired pinko staging a sit-in to have the US Constitution amended to allow for bestiality, Rezko is in jail for his retarded attempts at controlling political discourse. There again, he’s not a perfect hippy since he got all that money in kickbacks, but he’s still a hippy, and therefore, not worth killing.
What have we learned here today? We’ve learned that you are judged by the company you keep. We learned that Barack Obama keeps company with hippies. That makes Barack Obama a hippie. We already know that hippies are evil; therefore; by the transitive property, Obama is evil.
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