Right Wing Extremist Vs. Law Enforcement

I find myself in a paradox. I’m sure you have all heard about the Department of Homeland Security report on right wing extremists. Basically the report warns law enforcement that right wing extremism is on the rise, and gives us some clues on how to spot right wing extremists.

You might be a dangerous right wing extremist if you don’t think Barack Obama is doing a good job. You might be a dangerous right wing extremist if you don’t want to see more restrictions on firearms and ammunition. You might be a dangerous right wing extremist if you think illegal immigration is a problem.

The paradox comes in because I am all of the above. So I guess I am supposed to be on the look out for myself. What should I do if I see myself? Should I notify Homeland Security, or the FBI? Should I take cover and call for back up? Should I try to apprehend myself? Apparently I am a threat to society and charged with protecting society. I am so confused.

See I don’t want to go to jail. Maybe I should hide from myself. I think I’ll have to stop shaving to avoid detection. That would cause me to grow a beard, and I might have a harder time recognizing myself. I thought about running, but I don’t think I can outrun me.

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11 Responses to “Right Wing Extremist Vs. Law Enforcement”

  1. Don’t worry about the threat you pose to yourself. Obama’s Civilian National Security Force is aware of the problem and will be by shortly.

  2. Have you considered opening fire every time you see a mirror? Regular suspects you would want PC before you reacted, but as dangerous as us right wingers are, I think we need to just skip all of that arrest control, and just start shooting are reflection every time we see it.

    Also, if you ever try to hold your reflection at gunpoint, you will see that he has a gun already aimed at you, and so lethal force is now justified.

  3. tazer proof Says:

    All the COPs I know are rightwing extremists. I suppose that could change when you get to the Wierd states up North, Then you’d get Cops
    conflicted with actually carrying a Piece because they dont believe in their primitive nature and concerned about tazer target eligibilty type things.

  4. Maybe we should all turn ourselves in at the same time. That’ll clog up things. It’ll be pretty hard to lock up or even home-monitor half the country…

  5. Xiphos, I like the idea. Mass confusion, and who would actually process us, as we are all turning ourselves in.

  6. You sound dangerous. Rat on yourself but cut a deal that as an informant you are free from prosecution. Then go into the witness protection program and say goodbye to the former you.

    Just don’t move near me. I’m an old man and you young people agitators make me nervous.

  7. Thanks for the advice, Don. Your blog is great, by the way. I didn’t use the obligatory BTW abbreviation because I know how you old guys don’t get those stupid abbreviations. You have been linked. That means I put some words on the side of my blog that people can click on and go to your blog.

  8. You could always taze yourself.

    You could go hide in a cave; you’ll never find yourself hiding in a cave.

  9. But you just gave it away, RT.

  10. Dangit!

  11. You should get one of those ankle bracelets and monitor yourself.
    If you go anywhere near guns or …………..

    Nevermind

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