Archive for November 5, 2008

Taser Saves Mule Deer

Posted in Criminal Justice, Humor, Law Enforcement Facts, News with tags , , , on November 5, 2008 by JumpOut

Don’t you just hate it when a deer gets its antlers tangled in your rope swing? I know I sure do. The poor thing runs around in circles until it breaks its own neck, or is shot by an opportunistic hunter. It’s an unfortunate situation.

You may be thinking, “JumpOut, there must be a better way to free a deer from a rope swing that doesn’t kill the deer.” Missoula County Sheriffs Deputies have found a safe and humane, yet funny in a Schadenfreude kinda way to free deer from rope swings.

Deputies taser mule deer

Missoula County sheriff’s deputies turned a Taser on a mule deer buck Tuesday in order to free the animal from a rope swing near Lolo.

“We were able to avoid having to euthanize it, so it worked out pretty well,” said Lt. Rich Maricelli.

While I am sure I would prefer to shoot the deer and then eat him, I am also sensitive to law enforcement concerns of traumatizing the little old lady that may have discovered a deer in her rope swing. So remember boys and girls, if you find a deer tangled in your rope swing use the taser. If you use it enough, you won’t have to cook the deer later.

Barrack Obama: Of the People, By the People, For the People, Chapter 4

Posted in Barrack Obama Biography, Humor, Politics with tags , , , , , , , , , on November 5, 2008 by JumpOut

As teh Messiah spake, the crowds gathered. They gathered in great multitudes in the cities and towns to hear teh One speak of redemption. They chanted and prayed. They cheered and hugged. They performed fellatio on each other to congratulate themselves on the monumental accomplishment of ending white guilt.

At the appointed time, at the appointed place, Barrack stood before the cheering multitudes. He said, “Can we make Amerikkka a better nation?” The crowd chanted, “YES WE CAN!” Obama said, “Can we hope for change?” The crowd chanted, “YES WE CAN!” The Most Merciful One On High said, “Can we defeat the forces of evil, and unite the world?” The crowd chanted “YES WE CAN!” Teh Messiah said, “Do you want salvation from the sins of your ancestors?” The crowd chanted, “YES WE CAN!” Barrack said, “I’ll tell you how!” The crowd chanted, “YES WE CAN!”

As the crowd continued to chant, “YES WE CAN!” the evil honkey McCraker was brought out before the crowd. McCracker had been trying to seize power over Amerikka and was the only obstacle left to prevent teh Messiah’s ascendancy.

Teh Messiah said, “Can we get rid of this white devil?” The crowd chanted, “YES WE CAN!” And with that, McCracker was tossed into the writhing, frenzied, crowd. McCracker then joined in, “YES WE CAN!”

Barrack then said, “Can you make me your leader?” The crowd chanted, “YES WE CAN!” Barrack said, “Then I absolve you of the sins of your ancestors. Go forth and sin no more.” The crowd chanted, “YES WE CAN!”

As the crowd continued to chant, “YES WE CAN!” Lord Obama gave a speech in celebration and acceptance of this monumental occasion. He said, “Amerikkka better have my money come rain sleet or snow. That bitch better have my money. Not some, not half, but all my cash. Because if she don’t, I’m gonna put my foot dead in her ass.”

The crowd chanted: “YES WE CAN

YES WE CAN

YES WE CAN

YES WE CAN!!!!1!1one!”

This has been part four of the Biography of Barrack Obama brought to you by ACORN, mind numbed sycophants, and Flyguy You can read the other chapters here.

The Barackolypse?

Posted in Linky Love with tags , , , , , on November 5, 2008 by JumpOut

Go forth to Conservative Political Humor and Satire by Radioactive Liberty and view the prophecy of what is to come.

It’s Like the Zoo

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , on November 5, 2008 by JumpOut

Go make fun of this comment! Ridicule the pooh-flinging monkey!

Some people would say giving someone like this more attention is just what they want. I don’t care, it’s fun to point and laugh at a pooh-flinging monkey.

Obama Wins!!!!

Posted in Uncategorized on November 5, 2008 by JumpOut

To my fellow ten percenters out there: WOLVERINES!!!

See you in the camps.